THINGS MY BOSS HAS SAID TO ME THAT SOUND MEAN BUT I KNOW THEY ARE MEANT WITH AFFECTION

  1. "Can you move so we can clean up your area? Since it is the most disgusting?"
  2. "You eat more than anyone I have ever known."
  3. "I knew you wrote this, because it ends with a cunnilingus scene."
  4. "You would be good on a reality show. You like fighting. I would probably be fired, because all I do is drink espresso and look at a wall."
  5. "You have food on your face."
  6. "You have saliva on your chin."
  7. "I am fat now because of you. Because of all of you. You girls eat so much. I feel like I just ate a version of myself."
  8. "Do you want to go home?"
  9. "I think you are only attracted to famous versions of yourself."
  10. "Why are you asking me this? Never ask me this again."
    When I asked him if I could run out and get coffee. He meant I should just do it with your asking him. He is very uncomfortable being an authority figure I think. This makes me love him all the more.