THOUGHTS WHILE WAITING TO ORDER TAKEOUT IN A SMALL CHINESE RESTAURANT

  1. New Englanders eat Chinese on New Years Eve.
  2. It's what we do.
  3. Even before I lived in New England, my dad (a native Masshole) disciplined us in the fine art of NYE Takeout Consumption.
  4. So now, my dad and I are standing in a mass of sweatshirt clad white Massachusetts residents in the lobby of a takeout place in Worcester.
  5. These white Massachusetts residents are very upset with the Chinese restaurant because they've been waiting for a very long time.
  6. Seriously, bros??
  7. You and a billion other people ordered large amounts of food.
  8. I mean, there are fifty of us in here.
  9. These place is about 100 sq ft.
  10. This is a small business.
  11. What?
  12. Did?
  13. You?
  14. Expect?