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- •chugged a cup of coffee w a side of Advil
- •ate 5 grapes
- •watched 4 episodes of a Hulu original show about millennial dating
An unfinished list
- •Pacey & JoeyFuck Dawson.
- •Brooke Davis & JulianThis kween deserves the world
- •Monica & ChandlerDuh.
Could probably clean my car.
- •An empty diet soda canLikely Diet coke
- •Empty gum packNot even helpful for a breath emergency
- •Art drawn by the three year old I babysit
- •So relatable
- •Not embarrassed to indulge w/ her man
- •First documented case of #rbf
- •BeerTrying so hard
- •SportsAny. All.
- •Outer spacePlease dont even
Sponsored by OkCupid and Tinder, the banes of my existence.
- •That time I ate spicy Korean food with a ginger who rode his bike to this date for an hour from his job at Home Depot while suffering from a sinus infection.This man reappeared months later as my boyfriends roommate's friend at a weekly bar trivia night.
- •That time I saw "12 Years A Slave" on a second date with a short man who had never eaten a fucking jelly beanHe then tried to kiss me in the parking garage and headbutted me. We still talked for like a month.
- •That time I got dinner at my favorite restaurant with my ex three days after our break-up in the middle of West Virginia after a week long road trip to move my life to Chicago.I sobbed on a bench, in a parking lot, and in my car. He still forgot to bring me half of my things.