On Being Needy

  1. There are some times where I require a lot from people in order to function
  2. I come from a family that worries a lot, and so I am constantly living in a worst case scenario in my head
    What if my dad doesn't make it home tonight? What if I don't make it home tonight? What if I have cancer? All of these thoughts rotate my mind on the daily with no justification whatsoever
  3. I also have gotten out of a lot of toxic friendships that made me feel worthless and like a burden
  4. The effects of which I still feel today
  5. So sometimes, it's hard for me to keep a level headed perspective about things
  6. And that is where my best friend, Michaela, comes in
  7. Mick knows me better than almost anyone else, and is always, 100% there for me when I need her and when I am being needy in general
  8. She's there to tell me I'm being ridiculous when I'm convinced my car got stolen during a party
    A technique that may not work for all forms of anxiety but does wonders for mine
  9. She gives me love and support when I keep sending her outfit ideas because I still get self conscious about the way I look
  10. She also works through scenarios with me so that I can talk about "worst case" without dwelling on it
  11. And for that I am so, so grateful
  12. And I think gratitude is one of the main reasons this friendship can keep working
    Besides the fact that our friendship is just flat out awesome
  13. I recognize that who I am can sometimes be a lot. And I also recognize how important and how special her steadfast, unconditional friendship is to me
  14. So usually after having a moment I tell her I love her and thank her for everything
  15. I also know that any and every time she comes to me with anxiety I will love and support her the same way she has done for me countless times
  16. Because this friendship is special and important, and even if friends are just supposed to support each other, we should never take it for granted
  17. And so I think that it is alright to be needy, as long as you can still recognize and thank the people who are there for you when you have those needs
  18. Because it reaffirms strong and healthy friendships! And those are great!