WEIRD SUPERSTITIONS IN MY FAMILY

My family is superstitious, but we have our own little traditions
  1. Don't cheers if there's only water in your glass
  2. NEVER touch a $50 bill
    These things are HIGHLY dangerous and unlucky. To this day I've never touched one
  3. NEVER touch the receipt from a Hudson News in an airport
    This one is actually true
  4. You can't have 18 stairs in your house
    The builders put 18 stairs in our house and my dad hates the number 18 so he had them add a tiny 19th step to be safe
  5. If you see a graveyard you have to tell these jokes:
    It's the dead center of town. People are just dying to get in. *cough cough* Sorry I keep coffin. What's wrong? You're acting a little stiff. The mood in this car is pretty grave. I do actually hear it's a bad place to beheaded. What? I'm dead serious. // anytime my family drives by a graveyard we all say these jokes in this order