KOREAN HEALTH REMEDIES I SHOULD HAVE QUESTIONED

And other scientific facts I didn't know were not scientific
  1. My mom's favorite pharmacist told me to puncture (only slightly) those small slots between my knuckles because it releases these liquids that apparently are blocking my knees from stretching thus keeping me short
  2. My mom's professor swore by the crushed ginger liquid he drank for every meal that got him to lose 50lbs.
  3. My mom fed me extracts from elk's horn because I was sickly as a baby
    Turns out it did change my body type and overall stamina--I have crazy energy now and don't have any allergies
  4. My dad would insist I eat eyes of fish because it would make me smarter
  5. Massaging the stretchy spot next to your thumb
    According to my dad, if massaging that spot hurts, it means your stomach is knotted up and must be released through acupuncture or some kid of earth-shattering burp.
  6. If your hair grows fast, it means you are a pervert
    Because I heard from a TV show bodily growth hormone is induced by sexual hormone (?) so if you have lots of sexual thoughts, your hair grows faster