Stages of Trying to Sleep on an Airplane

  1. This movie sucks.
  2. I feel like I could fall asleep.
  3. Oh man, I'm super drowsy. I'm gonna sleep so hard on this flight.
  4. All right, let me queue up this episode of Fresh Air with Terri Gross to fall asleep to.
  5. I feel like this is gonna work. I'm gonna sleep for the next 6 hours at least.
  6. I guess I'll just put this blanket over me and on top of my shoulders. This feel weird, but I trust it.
  7. Why does Terri Gross always say "Fresh Air" with that same over emphasized voice?
  8. I guess that's her thing. I shouldn't police the way women talk.
  9. I'm not sleeping yet.
  10. I'm not asleep.
  11. Why am I listening to an interview with the author a book about the intersectionality of Jerry Seinfeld and police brutality? This is terrible.
  12. I'll never sleep.
  13. I'm going to arrive and feel terrible.
  14. I hate everything.
  15. I'm gonna keep my eyes closed and see if that works.
  16. It's not working.
  17. How am I so wired right now?
  18. I should restring my ukulele.
  19. Stop letting your mind wander! Sleep! SLEEP RIGHT NOW.
  20. Sleep? Sleep, sleep, slee-- it's not working.
  21. I wonder if stages of trying to sleep on an airplane would make a good list.
  22. Don't look at your phone, the light will make you more awake.
  23. Just keep your eyes closed and go to sleep.
  24. Screw it.