NON-ARTISANAL SODAS, RANKED

  1. 1.
    Any root beer
  2. 2.
    Diet Coke from a soda fountain
  3. 3.
    Dr. Browns Black Cherry
    Diet OR regular!
  4. 4.
    Mountain Dew
    Seriously I know it's been coopted by gamer/coder culture but this beverage is amazing, especially the original formula/cane sugar version. (When I was in Knoxville last month we drove past the building where it was invented; it's now a laundromat.) I should also probably mention that Dr. Enuf > Mountain Dew but that's a whole other story.
  5. 5.
    Non-diet Coke in a super-cold can
  6. 6.
    Strawberry Fanta
    But only a little bit. Too much is too much.
  7. 7.
    Dr Pepper
  8. 8.
    Sunkist Orange
    Instant childhood time machine
  9. 9.
    7-Up
    Slightly less syrupy than sprite?