VERY PRIVATE PLEASURES

  1. When there's leftover pasta in the fridge and I go to the fridge to get something else but I sneak a bite
  2. Making swirly shapes with hair on the shower wall
    This became way less fun when I cut my hair short
  3. Telling someone who lives near you but who you don't want to talk to for another hour that you're taking a different subway than they are, and then walking a block and getting in a cab
  4. Being alone in an elevator and checking myself out in the security mirror
  5. Thinking horribly violent things at slow-walking tourists on my way to work
    Namaste and whatever but this is surprisingly soothing
  6. Pointedly not following someone famous/interesting on Instagram but every few weeks just bingeing on their stream
  7. Wearing new socks
  8. Staring at my pores in a magnifying mirror in a fancy hotel
    Bonus for fancy hotel bathrobe