THINGS ABOUT THE HOLIDAY SEASON THAT FILL ME WITH DREAD AND DESPAIR

Yeah, I said it. I hate Thanksgiving, Christmas and all the trimmings.
  1. Thanksgiving dinner sucks balls. How much white food can you serve at one long shitty all day prep meal? White turkey, white mashed potatoes, white bread stuffing, green beans with white cream of mushroom soup mixed in, white rolls...it's fucking terrible.
  2. No parking anywhere
  3. Overwhelming obligations. Decorate, bake, wrap shit, host family gatherings. Which leads me to my next item...
  4. Resentment. I resent the massive time suck. I resent the psychic energy wasted on it. I'm just one big ball of resentment by Dec 24th.
  5. Too much forced socialization. I am not good with huggers and fake sincerity at any time during the year, but it's especially excruciating in the dead of winter when I've already got SAD.
  6. Obscene commercialism 1: I've tried the "hey, let's give to the charity of your choice and help the less fortunate" but somehow I'm the asshole for suggesting it.
  7. Obscene commercialism 2: Have you ever seen happy people at the mall during xmas season? Me neither. Everyone is just grimly checking off another item on their to do list as quickly as possible.
  8. All the "put Christ back in Christmas" bullshit posturing that happens. These are the same assholes that would shank their neighbors for the black Friday deal at walmart, and you're going to preach at me about the meaning of the season? Go fuck yourself.