my worst date (so far)

true story of mine but might not be that interesting based on your standards
  1. we started talking on tinder that same day and we first met up for dinner at a Mediterranean place
    he was really sweet and insisted he pay, etc
  2. during the dinner, he told me he he was leaving the city in a week... permanently...
    yes I know it's tinder seriously what should I be expecting right? but he could have mentioned it in the chat
  3. also during the dinner, he subtly suggested going to a bar afterward and you know what? sure why not. I said yeah
  4. after dinner, we walked to the bar on the same street and talked for a while. i was drinking my beer really slowly because i didn't like it that much and he asked why, probably assuming i was really uptight
    eventually he dropped that topic
  5. at the bar, he started boasting about how many "risky" things he did in undergrad. there was some story about him jumping into a river, getting into locked undergrad buildings at night, etc
    i don't remember the specifics but honestly it wasn't that crazy
  6. he told me he once broke into the apartment building nearby and broke the lock to the door that workers used to get to the roof and asked if I wanted to do that
  7. i just said sure and so we went to his car and got a wrench and then went to the apartment building and broke into (correct phrase?) the roof
  8. we talked some more about the city while sitting on the roof and he tried to kiss me but i wasn't feeling too into him so i rejected the kiss but didn't say anything to end the date
  9. interpreting that as not a rejection, he kept flirting. when we got down from the roof we started walking and I said something that mentioned my apartment
    just out of the blue because I wanted something to say, I said "you want to see my apartment?" This wasn't meant as a booty call
  10. he said yes and we went to my apartment
    we sat on the couch and talked a little and very quickly he said "can we make out?"
  11. the fact that he didn't have some sort of cute move made me ask: "why?" just kind of as a flirty test
    his reply was: "because it's fun?"
  12. so even though i wasn't into it we made out. for some reason he asked: "am i the first guy you've made out with in a while?"
    ok hold up wtf don't blame this on me, maybe you're not doing a great job on this date thing maybe that's the reason
  13. i made up some lie about a bad recent breakup with an ex but i was kinda pissed off
    i was kinda making some kind of hints for him to leave
  14. he didn't take the hints, instead he asked if he could sleep at my place (no sex, just to sleep over because "it was late")
    i said fine ok it's late but i'm only sleeping
  15. so i clearly wasn't able to sleep with him there and asked if he could leave
  16. he made some excuse like "oh my roommate isn't answering me so can i sleep on the couch?"
  17. I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF YOU HAVE NO PLACE TO GO THAT'S NOT MY RESPONSIBILITY
    .....is what I should have said
  18. instead I said fine but I'm kicking you out in the morning
  19. He slept on the couch and I kicked him out in the morning
  20. HE ALSO INSISTED ON USING MY MOUTHWASH IN THE MORNING UM WTF I AM NOT SOME SORT OF CHARITY
    .... is what I should have said
  21. he said some shit like "oh I'm opening a new mouthwash bottle what an honor, first use"
    UM CAN YOU NOT TELL THAT YOU'RE AN ENTITLED SOB?!?!?!? (Is what I should have said)
  22. then i kicked him out.