Max is my 12 year old white lab. He has the looks of the show dog and the medical ailments of a 90 year old man.
  1. He is missing a toe
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    I constantly wonder what it would be like to live without my pinkie toe (reference things I wonder pt. 1 list), so Max is a model of inspiration for me. He is never self conscious. He rocks his 3 toe'd paw like a fresh pair of air yeezys.
  2. He has so many allergies but DGAF
    Since he was a puppy Max has been put on a specific brand of dog food. To get this straight - for 12 years he has eaten the same thing three times a day. Could you eat the same thing....three times a day... For 12 years....
  3. His favorite snacks are bumble bees and oak leaves
    Max's allergies never stop him from finding some organic delicacies of his own. Case 1: Bumble bees. He only likes them dead but boy does he like the sting at the end. Case 2: Oak tree leaves. If your familiar with oak tree leaves, you know they have thorns on the tips and hurt like hell when you step on them. Easy to say his snacks are more bad ass than yours.
  4. He loves America
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    This year Max got an AMERICA bone for Christmas, and loved it. I've never seen him this happy. This smile is OG because he's patriotic and seems like he loves his country.
  5. He watches Star Wars with me
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    Max doesn't watch all TV, but when I make him watch Star Wars he really gets into it.
  6. He has a "Piggy Ridge"
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    The "piggy ridge" is what I call Max's extra skin from being stunted in his teenage years. Max is already 110lbs (not fat just studly) and STILL has extra flub. If he grew into that he would be the mightiest of all labs.