Nice things people say to me and the immediate thoughts that follow them

And yet my reaction is usually a blank stare and alternating between mumbling thank you and "wow sorry I'm actually really busy I have to go back to work now"
  1. Every time I see you your hair always smells amazing!
    Thank you, I'm moderately depressed (like every other 24 year old) and haven't showered in three days but dry shampoo is a hell of a product
  2. You care a lot about your employees!
    ....and lately not enough about myself bye I'm taking a 2 week vacation what is the health and fitness industry all I know is poutine and staring at my boyfriend's chiseled jawline
  3. Did you get a keratin treatment?
    Nope, brushed my hair today
  4. You're so funny, and pretty too! (Usually accompanied by a wink of some sort?)
    I'd like to thank the year 2002 when my mother refused to buy me roll on body glitter and the year 2004 for my emo phase and the subsequent development of my personality
  5. You've lost weight, you look great!
    I should stop eating snacks and start eating meals