Favorite Types of Uber Drivers, Lightly Ranked.

As an uber Uber user, these are the things I think about on the reg. But let's be honest: everyone gets five stars from me, because that's how I roll. (Cheerful, naive, optimistic.)
  1. The one who...is silent.
    Sometimes, I don't want to have to work for it. I just want to sit quietly in my Uber and read LISTS and not pretend to care about whatever it is you're saying, sir.
  2. The one who...lets me have a dance party.
    Because sometimes you just need to dance in the backseat with your friends, and this guy doesn't mind turning up the music.
  3. The one who...volunteers to play my playlist/charge my phone.
    You sir/ma'am are a gem. Thank you for not making me ask. It feels really nice that you're a) so proactive about taking care of me and b) generous of spirit, because I could have awful taste in music for all you know.
  4. The one who...wants to have a super strange talk.
    I like strangers and strange chats with strangers, especially when they're strange, self-appointed experts on strange topics. This happens to me a lot in Ubers, like the stance conversation I had about Studio 54 and the fluid sexuality of the mid-to-late '70s. Even if he was lying, it was still interesting.
  5. The one who...opens my door.
    I'd say this happens more in LA (71% of the time) than NYC (45% of the time), but I am never mad at it when it does.
  6. The one who...is Mr. Mints
    Some cars are so fully stocked—why hello there extensive selection of candy, mints, and gum—it's amazing.
  7. The one who...will stop at a taco truck and knows the best one in the area.
    Suggested by   @daniellenuss