And by "you" I mean "me." (Sally: "And I'm gonna be 40..." Harry: "In 8 years!" Sally: "But it's out there.")
  1. A post-workout bath with some lavender Epson salts sounds just lovely.
    True story: this is where I write approximately 4 out of 5 lists!
  2. You listen to words instead of music sometimes...on purpose.
    Admittedly this started with The Psychiatry Hour on Sirius' Doctor Radio, but still. Words over music? Even if they belong to a great podcast? Younger me would be so confused.
  3. You have a shared calendar for social thangs with the SO.
    Now let's be honest: @jonathan did this for me, knowing I like being organized and planning ahead. And we don't use it that much. But still: it feels awfully mature, albeit in a way that I I like very much.
  4. You have a reserve of backup birthday/engagement/wedding/new baby/sorry-about-that-death cards.
    To be young is to be ill-prepared (is to be sad, is to be high). I am totally prepared.
  5. You have a reserve of all-important beauty/health/wellness products, because God forbid you run out.
    When the apocalypse comes, you're all welcome to come by my house for Cetaphil body moisturizer, one specific type of Crest toothpaste, and fancy face creams galore.
  6. Squinting.
    My eye doctor said I'm fine, but when I'm tired, sometimes the words on my phone get blurry. Okay this happens like a lot. Ugh.
  7. Dancing at home > dancing out there.
    I like a dance party at my house, my house.
  8. You've gotta a guy for that.
    Travel agent in Mexico. Hot butcher. Spray tanner who comes to your house. Flower guy. Reservation hookup. Diamond guy. Monogrammer. Lawyer. Just saying you've got contacts, old school contacts. And context. And you're happy to share, especially because you had none of these things before turning 32.
  9. You make people text you when they get home.
    Even when home is two blocks around the corner, it's daylight, and everybody's sober. Because who knows! (Cough: @katiegoodwin.) I don't remember being this caring or careful in my 20s.
  10. You finally start to abide by the "no caffeine after 2 p.m." rule religiously.
    Because fuck you insomnia! You might come for me, but it's not because I didn't practice good sleep hygiene or drank coffee too late in the day.
  11. You learn having the hard conversation, early > Avoiding the hard conversation, feeling sick, hoping it goes away, oh you forgot about it, nope wait it's here again, and now everything is poisoned because you were an avoidant coward.
    Um, relationships. Yeah.