7 HORRIFIC MOMENTS FROM TODAY
Because the glass is always half empty.
- •When I accidentally ate raw chicken because it was breaded and in the freezer and when you see a "chicken tender" you microwave it and don't ask questions.Now I'm just waiting for it to strike. My toilets gonna be so sad.
- •When the old white lab I'm dogsitting picked up a piece of poop with its mouth and began eating it in front of my very eyes.This is the fourth time I've caught her doing this and she has no shame.
- •While applying to jobs on Craigslist I had the realization nobody respectable will ever hire me because i have a degree in theatre.And I refuse to apply anywhere that requires a cover letter. I am a writer.
- •When I realized I have a lot in common with Stassi Schroeder from Bravo's Vanderpump Rules.I am now subscribed to her podcast.
- •When I talked to Denise at poison control for the raw chicken and she didn't make me feel like a priority.Also she asked my weight. DENISE!
- •Discovering Bachelor in Paradise is NOT on Hulu, Netflix, or Amazon Prime.I invest in my passions and that is television.
- •Buying Bachelor in Paradise season 1 on iTunes.And not springing for HD.