Things I've Said to My Dog Today

  1. "That's my monster. He's weird but I kind of like him."
  2. "You're so cute that I feel bad for everyone else who has a dog because I got the cutest one!"
  3. "Do not wipe your mouth on my clothes."
  4. "You donkey-kicked me!"
  5. "That's you, goof."
    As he growled and barked at his reflection in the mirror.
  6. "You're funny. Creepy, but funny."