My evil thoughts put to paper
  1. "Like" 30 week old pictures of people's exes
  2. Post all selfies in phone memory
  3. Upload all pictures to Facebook that are found in "Recently Deleted"
  4. Make the "Storage Full" message pop up every hour on the hour
  5. Make U2's album pop up on every playlist ever created on the phone
  6. Have the alarm go off every day at 4:35am
  7. Place an outgoing call to "Mom's Cell" every Friday night at 12:43am
  8. Send a mass text saying "wassap homiess" to all contacts once a month
  9. Change the entry passcode with specific strange instructions on how to unlock the phone
    Think: scavenger hunt style. Eg. Kiss a strangers foot, eat a peanut butter and olive sandwich, etc.