REASONS I CAN'T WAIT TO MOVE OUT
Don't get me wrong, I love my parents. They're my best friends. But at some point I'm finally going to move out and never move back in.
- •Privacy, privacy, privacyThe amount of times my dad had started walking upstairs while I'm changing is unacceptable. Sure, I could close the door, but I have the entire second floor to myself and it's rare for my dad to venture up. But without fail, anytime he does, I'm stark naked.
- •Labeling food gets oldMy parents used to be the best grocery shoppers in town. They bought the good stuff while saving some serious dough with coupons. That's no longer the case. Every time I spend my own money on groceries, I barely even get to eat them. My parents don't think to ask before sampling my brand-name products. I'm so ready to stock a fridge full of food just for me.
- •Our schedules are totally differentI work a five-hour morning/afternoon shift five days a week at a local restaurant while my dad has a full-time government job and my mom substitute teaches and babysits my young nieces. I wake up at a decent hour and go to bed pretty late. My morning routine is usually pretty casual and quick while my nights are filled with Spotify blasting from speakers or Netflix from my TV. My parents are falling asleep as I'm trying to jam out. It doesn't work.
- •Coming this summer to a theater near you... "Don't Meet the Parents!"I have a boyfriend. And we're technically long-distance since we live three hours apart. Sure, it's no across-the-universe romance, but still. It'd be nice if we could spend more than one afternoon together every other week. I'm a big fan of sleepovers, even if they're kept PG! But that can't happen with my parents hanging around all the time. Sure, they can casually bump into each other a time or two, but I just want to cuddle with my guy in peace. Like in my own apartment. On my own couch.
- •"Should we leave the light on?"I have a decent social life and although I know it's just because they care about me and want me to be safe, my parents asking me where I'm going and who I'm going with every time I pick up my keys gets so old. I'll let you know if I'm not coming home until the next day, but otherwise, just cut me a little slack. I'm fine! I'm not drug dealing, sneaking into 21+ clubs, or vandalizing buildings. I'm at Applebee's or watching House Hunters with a friend.
- •I won't be nagged about the water billThe shower is my happy place. Let me be held accountable for the high-priced bill when I take three hour-long showers a week. I'm sure I'll snap out of that habit fairly quick.