THINGS PEOPLE SAY

When I enjoy what is said around me
  1. "I see the evidence but I've been feeling my butt occasionally and I don't feel anything!" - Natalie
  2. "You are irrelevant to the grand scheme of life." - Noreen
  3. "Just a warning if you see Steve Jobs, Michael Fassbender makes Steve Jobs hot so now I'm confused and uncomfortable." - Noreen
  4. "Not that board, the bulletin board, you meatball!" - Reed
  5. "I wish I had a big house, with a lot of rooms, with no RA's so I could high every day and not get in trouble. Life's hard for a white man." - Natalie
  6. "Come together is the kind of song I imagine you rolling a joint to." - Miriam
  7. "Everything about fun. is passive aggressive." -Lily
  8. "Have you seen black Ian? It came out during spades." - Max
  9. "Getting your car towed is not an adventure. It's a bureaucratic process." - Max
  10. "All bureaucratic processes are adventures." - Ian
  11. "[The Clintons] are kind of conniving. I like it." - Emma
  12. "They're so freaking liberal, like, the moonbats." - Emma
  13. "I would Monica Lewinsky Joe Biden." - Ariana
  14. "You are 100% not supposed to say Polaroid picture." - Ana
  15. "Is that man going to play the piano? If he plays sad songs I will pay him millions." - Chris
  16. "Confession time- I have soft feet. That doesn't happen on its own guys." - Eddie
  17. "Pamela was telling me 'holy shit Eddie your feet' and I was like, yes I know I have some toe-fro but they're soft as a baby's behind." - Eddie
  18. "Let me give you some learnin about wet dreams You will wake up the instant before or after the instant after you ruin your sheet. Even if you sleep through it there are symptoms." - Eddie
  19. "That's how 50 cent went bankrupt." - Natalie
  20. "I love this! It's like requiem for a dream but for kids." - Natalie
  21. "It's like role play but no sexy times." - Buzz
    In preparation for me to go teach children.
  22. "I'm not eating chips, that's why I'm so sad" - Natalie
  23. "All the mad max people are scary and weird." - Natalie
  24. "Mad Max is scary and weird." - Hannah
  25. "He's like Jeb Bush but without the sad." - Natalie (about Mark Ruffalo)
  26. "We can't be too anal about hanging rock and roll posters that kind of defeats the whole point." - Davis