I Got Hit on in a Thrift Store Today

  1. In the toddler shorts section
  2. By a man at least twice my age, but probably older.
    I'm 32.
  3. Who had no teeth.
  4. And a strong musk.
  5. Who was browsing through children's winter coats.
    We live in Hawaii.
  6. He smiles at me and makes a joke
    I don't understand what he is saying and assume he is speaking another language. I smile at him and turn back to the shorts.
  7. He laughs, slapping his knee a bit and makes another joke.
    I giggle nervously, wondering if he is speaking English and just what I'm laughing at.
  8. He winks at me and says what I think is "you married?"
    But I'm not sure and I don't want to presume. So I just smile in a distracted type of way and focus with renewed energy on the 2t shorts.
  9. He reached out and gently taps my (bare) ring finger. "Are you married?"
    Oh my gosh. I was right.
  10. I turn bright red and stutter, "oh! Um... Yes! Yes! For 10 years! He's great! His name is Matt! Yep, uh, 10 years for me!"
    Only I could make the truth sound like a total lie.
  11. He shrugs and says "Too bad." Then he winks at me and strolls on to another section.
  12. The swagger!
  13. I wish I had taken a selfie with him.