The Sun Is A Beautiful, Searing Lie

A cautionary tale.
  1. Oh, so it's the first day of your long-awaited vacation! You're finally at the beach. It's been so long since you've felt the sand between your toes and heard the water roaring.
  2. It's so beautiful and SUNNY, you think to yourself.
  3. After a nice, refreshing dip in the sea, you decide to dry out in the sun.
  4. You've applied sunscreen, you're good! No worries.
  5. You lay out on your towel, soaking up some sun.
  6. Maybe I'll finally get a tan, you think.
  7. Here is where the lies begin.
  8. You feel your skin tighten, and grow quite warm.
  9. That's just the sun doing its thing! you think.
  10. At your parents' insistence, you flip over onto your stomach.
  11. You feel so warm and blissed out. You never want to get up.
  12. Eventually, you do. You carry on with your day.
  13. You feel slightly... Acidic. Burned.
  14. Whatever.
  15. OH NO. You wake up the next morning, desiccated and charred.
  16. Only rigorous applications of lidocaine-infused aloe vera gel can save you.
  17. Also, Aleve.
  18. You buy a large floppy hat and sunglasses. You wear them constantly. This makes you feel powerful and glamorous.
  19. Then, your skin starts to peel. This is good, because it means you are healing.
  20. But you also feel like a flaky monster. You only realize this when you go out in public.
  21. 🌞
  22. In conclusion: Go outdoors. But only if you cover yourself in 2-4 layers of SPF 70, a hat, sunglasses, and multiple layers of clothing.
  23. The Sun. It's not your friend.
  24. Marvel at the fact that you live on a rock in space where poisonous, invisible rays can burn your skin!!!!!!!
  25. The End.