WHY I'M SURE COSTCO IS PURGATORY

  1. when you walk in, someone greets you, but if you look in their eyes......are they happy to see you? or a they just looking towards the exit, and thinking about boobies and BBQ?
  2. you pass all the super fancy electronics that represent a life in colors, and lighting that you never remember real life having.
  3. pass by the Clothes Folder Hive---- one queen bee directing traffic and presentation---- lots of little drones doing the job, but just barely
  4. Meat---so much meat----but just beyond the freezer some fresh blood? maybe some tears as well?
  5. gah----i'm heading back out----it's too much
  6. food court--hot dogs are only a buck fifty? with a free coke? yeah, those first 4 are great. then gravity deals it's cards. where is my insulin chaser?
  7. made it past the registers, past the last phalanx of those Professional Smilers at Membership, with their laser gun upgrades, and free gas, with a tire purchase..........
  8. the exit---it's right there......jail break! wait. where is your reciept? you're staying, until we sort this out. did you come in wearing those Danskos?