MY IDEAL FUNERAL
- •Jon Hamm & Kristen Wiig come as a couple, as per my final wish.
- •My boss’s 3 dogs attend, wearing all black and those lace masks that people wore in the Victorian era.
- •Tina Fey & Amy Poehler do two person improv.
- •Ryan Gosling shows up with bagels and lox, which makes everyone laugh, like “oh Ryan!!!”
- •There are at least four different kinds of soup, and two have to be matzo ball.
- •Eddie Redmayne dramatically reads some of my best tweets.
- •JK Rowling writes a prequel to the Harry Potter series but only writes one copy, by hand, and buries it with me.
- •At a tender moment while the security guard from Bank of America Glendale branch is talking about our treasured friendship, Judith Light sheds a single tear.