RETINOBLASTOMA

It's true that you don't truly feel something until it affects your family.
  1. It's a Cancer that forms in the retina
  2. Unfortunately it's not affecting someone who's lived a long life. It's tragic no matter who's affected, but it's more emotional when it's an innocent baby.
  3. Landon was diagnosed this last week.
    (My brother playing with him a few months ago.) He's lost sight of his right eye already.
  4. When eyes are caught by a flash, one eye will reflect red like everyone else's, but the affected eye will reflect white.
  5. Landon is 1 and a half years old
    He's only just started to talk and show us who he is. He's my cousin. When you happen to have a large family like mine, second cousins are more like nieces and nephews because my generation is already so much older.
  6. I'm scared.
  7. I'm scared that he won't get to learn what we have to teach.
  8. I'm scared that he may not be around to hear stories we have to tell.
  9. I'm scared he won't get to see how much his family loves him.
  10. I'm scared for his parents
    No one should have to go through this. NO ONE.
  11. There's hope.
    We're hoping that the cancer hasn't spread towards his brain. He's undergoing an MRI to see the extent of the tumor's growth.
  12. Option 1
    Chemo and Radiation
  13. Option 2
    Remove the eye and replace with a prosthetic
  14. We're pulling for option 2. We're hoping it hasn't spread beyond the retina.
  15. It's incredibly difficult to go about the day, smile, and make polite conversation. I don't want to be around anyone, but at the same time I do. How does one even deal with this?
  16. The worst is when someone asks "how are you doing", a politeness, but a heavy question lately.
  17. It's easy to get distracted and find some sort of joy, but then you snap back to feeling your heavy heart, your smile fades, your eyes blur, and your brows furl again.
  18. I'm trying to be optimistic and have faith that everything will be okay.
  19. But there's also a part of me that's fearing the worst.
  20. I'm crying for you tonight Landon.