Aka the story of my life
  1. People are emotionally exhausting
    It's nobody's intention but for example: the first day of school every year is just so draining. Saying hi, making small-talk, having to work constantly to process the fast-firing input from so many facial expressions, body messages, vocal tones, conversations...after months of being blissfully alone. I can't exactly explain it but so much interaction makes my brain freak out and then when it's over I feel drained of all energy and motivation
  2. It's not that I don't like you, I just don't want to go to your party w 10 billion other people who have personalities like 🎉
  3. Which, 🎉 is great, I don't hate you
  4. In fact I admire that
  5. I wish I could be more 🎉
  6. It's just so overwhelming when there's so much 🎉 all at the same time.
    My mind and emotions can't process it quickly enough bc of the noise / enthusiasm overload--again, not bad for you, just hard for me. I DONT HATE YOU ❤️❤️❤️
  7. I love books bc the people in them are realistic but not actually there
    I get to engage with characters emotionally as much or as little as I want, so if I'm overwhelmed by people I can just seek refuge in the characters I relate to and tone down my interactions with the others
  8. I prefer writing to talking sometimes because I can fabricate what I say when I'm writing, so that it's just right and wholly communicative and I don't have to worry about missing something or sounding weird or having odd mannerisms or messing up
    Aaaannnddddd that's why I love Listapp ❤️
  9. I want to be alone sometimes
  10. Even though I love my friends & family
  11. I sometimes like to sit quietly all by myself and just sort my brain or listen to music or go for a drive or look at the sky
  12. And you don't have to feel bad bc I "have no one to hang out with" or bc I'm "all alone"
  13. All alone =/= lonely
  14. And lonely =/= bad
    Necessarily..sometimes lonely is good because it's poignant and sometimes lonely is sad but I like it and sometimes lonely is sad and I don't like it...
  15. I probably won't make it obvious when I'm having a rough time
    And if you can't tell, it's not on you, it's on me. But if you can tell, I'll probably (maybe unjustly) love you more
  16. I don't expect you to get why I feel the things I do when I do, especially if you're an extrovert,
  17. And I don't expect you to "get it" when I'd rather stay in than go to my senior prom
  18. But I do expect you to let me have it, and give me my space when I ask 👍🏽
  19. I love everybody, just sometimes from a distance 💞