HOW TO STOP BEING PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE
For anyone who struggles with this...
- •Don't ask for something and then take it back.Example: "I was wondering if you would mind picking me up from work tomorrow - but only if it's not too much trouble!"
- •Avoid questions or statements that contain vague words, like "possibly" or "maybe" or "not sure" or "perhaps."Example: "Can we maybe set up a meeting sometime to talk about this?"
- •Don't withhold praise or another normal behavior for an underlying purpose.Example: Deciding intentionally not to share a compliment for a job well done because you're angry about something else the person did.
- •Stop apologizing unnecessarily.Example: "Really sorry to bother you about this, but..."
- •Avoid unnecessary justifications.Example: "I only bring this up, because XYZ..."
- •Don't make excuses/blame someone else instead of taking personal ownership or giving constructive feedback.Example: "I actually think you would be a great fit for this project - but others didn't - so I'm sorry, unfortunately we had to give the opportunity to someone else."
- •Don't make promises that you know you can't fulfill.Example: "We should definitely get together! I'll call you soon." (When you know you won't.)
- •Avoid taking a roundabout route to get to your point.Example: "So she has been pretty sick and he said his friend is having an emergency. I would love to help, but I'm bad at math. So here we are and I'm not sure how we are going to get this done! Haha, you know?"
- •Avoid people-pleasing and saying things to someone directly that aren't in line with what you're saying about them to others.Self-explanatory. We are better than this!