BEST HORRIFIC WORDPLAY IN PRO WRESTLING NOMENCLATURE
All of these names were actually used by grown men who could legitimately beat the crap out of 99% of the world's population (one-on-one, that is...)
- •JACK DUPPI feel like this guy didn't win very often considering he's named after a synonym for "beaten up."
- •C.N. REDDHe's a big ginger man who dresses in all red and apparently has anger issues!
- •M.I. SMOOTHI like this one because it's a name and a question
- •TERRA RYZINGIs his name a reference to the ground rising or a description of his intended effect? This was never made clear. Fun fact: Went on to become Triple H!
- •HUGH MORRISThe laughing man! Went on to become, I swear to God...
- •HUGH G. RECTIONWent further on to become the head of the WWE Performance Center before resigning after allegations of sexual and physical harassment. So, to summarize, a man named Hugh G. Rection was sexually harassing other wrestlers. I don't know what else they were expecting.
- •IRWIN R. SCHYSTERHis initials are I.R.S. and he's a wrestling tax auditor! He used to team up with the Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase, which is super weird because you'd figure they'd be natural enemies.
- •PHINEAS I. GODWINN AND HENRY O. GODWINNThey're wrestling pig farmers! Get it??? In this picture, they're accompanied by Hillbilly Jim whose name was Hillbilly fucking Jim
- •ISAAC YANKEM, D.D.S.He's a wrestling dentist and his name abbreviated to I. Yankem! He also went on to become Kane, the demonic brother of Undertaker (a name not so much weighed down with wordplay as heavy-handed symbolism)
- •PAUL BEARERI learned what a pallbearer was years after I knew about Paul Bearer. I didn't put the two together for a couple more years.
- •KIM CHEEThere is so much going on in this picture. Kim Chee is the "handler" of Kamala, the Ugandan Giant (actually a dude named Ron Harris). Why is he named after kimchi? Is he supposed to be Korean? Are Koreans known for colonizing Africans? Does the fact that he's played by a white guy make this yellowface? I feel like Kim Chee is a racist caricature but I just don't know how or why. There is no doubt about Kamala, however. He is the most racist character ever. Actually, that isn't even true.