You know the drill. Who do you want to drill?
  1. This is Dilbert
    Static
  2. This is Wally
    Static
  3. This is the Pointy-Haired Boss
    Static
  4. Go.
  5. Fuck Wally kill the boss marry Dilbert
    Suggested by @tombatten
  6. Fuck Dilbert, Marry Wally, Kill PHB
    Wally doesn't give a fuck. Knowing him, it's just a nihilistic tax haven for both of us.
    Suggested by @LevNovak
  7. Fuck them all, marry none, convince their creator to kill them all. Start over with new female based cartoon strip.
    Suggested by @lynn0826
  8. Fuck the boss as means of manipulating him into doing something stupid like having the company invest in my etsy startup, marry Wally, kill Dilbert.
    Suggested by @PawneeGoddess