FOODS THAT YOU'LL NEVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT ME EATING OFF YOUR PLATE

Your nasty vegetables are safe with me. (Burn this list when I have children, as I will lie to their faces and pantomime eating this green stuff that's so "good for them."
  1. Melons
    Cante-dont. Watermel-gross. Honeydew-not feed me any melons. I'll gag.
  2. Mushrooms
    I can't put my finger on why exactly these sneaky little guys are so gross.
  3. Pickles
    Once my mom bought me a chick-fil-a sandwich with pickles and I wouldn't eat it. She told me I was a brat and to just take the pickles off, but sometimes just thinking of the smell of pickle residue is enough to make me queasy.
  4. Brussel sprouts
    one time @drewworsham and I got into it at dinner because I just scooped all the bacon out of the Brussel sprouts when we had guests over. I love bacon with as much passion as I hate Brussel sprouts.
  5. Oysters
    I can't quite pinpoint what's so bad about these guys. Probably some combination of texture, smell, effort, taste, appearance. So....everything.