A Few Things to Keep in Mind About Geese

  1. They aren't just mean ducks
  2. They aren't people
  3. If they were people they probably wouldn't give all that many fucks about whether or not you like them
  4. They sound like dinosaurs but they're smaller
  5. Their webbed toes, sturdy legs, strong wings, and fireproof feathers mean that they've mastered all the elements
  6. They love gluten more than you hate it
  7. They're done with this discussion
  8. Honk