THINGS NORA EPHRON HAS TAUGHT ME

Fuck the singular ah-ha moment: I haven't stopped nodding my head and thinking "yes, ok, I understand me now" since the second I picked up an Ephron book. That I never got to meet her is my biggest professional/emotional/selfie-opportunistic regret. Tomorrow would'vet been her 74th birthday.
  1. "Everything is copy."
    This is the most important lesson I've ever learned (check my Twitter for this concept in action). Every story has the ability to be interesting, but only if you make it so.
  2. How to make mashed potatoes / how to boil an egg
    This, not coincidentally, are the only two things I can "cook." I consult Heartburn each time I want to do either.
  3. What to do if you ever get mugged at therapy
    Turn that rock to face yr palm and drop it into yr bra!!! Rachel Samstat, you did everything right!
  4. How to stop wallowing in pity
    "My religion is 'get over it.'" Don't you dare try to say this to me when my favorite restaurant closes, though.
  5. The importance of Zabar's // how to be professional food enthusiast
    Because of Nora, I **know** that I am the most interesting part of any story that isn't explicitly about food.
  6. That 1980s-era Billy Crystal was the hottest thing on two legs
    100% serious when I say he is my celebrity crush // not a coincidence that my boyfriend has that same lil hair tuft
  7. There's a difference between telling yr story and having a story told about you
    "Because if I tell the story, I control the version. Because if I tell the story, I can make you laugh, and I would rather have you laugh at me than feel sorry for me. Because if I tell the story, it doesn't hurt as much. Because if I tell the story, I can get on with it." - Heartburn
  8. "I can't get over this aspect of journalism. I can't believe how real life never lets you down. I can't understand why anyone would write fiction when what actually happens is so amazing."
    I went to a small college with only one non-fiction writing class; for the rest, I say surrounded by people who just MADE STUFF UP and I couldn't understand why they just wouldn't write about their lives!! Fuck aliens! Screw talking pigs! Death to sparkly vampires!!!! I used to quote this line (from My Neck, I think?) verbatim to my boyfriend (we met in the fiction class).
  9. Never buy a red coat
    This is from her mom, but still
  10. Above all, be confident in your own voice
    If it weren't for Nora, I'd be convinced that I was nothing but a dithering, narcissistic ninny who took where she eats way too seriously. Instead I know that I am a hungry, stylish, know-it-all who is not weird for being the only person in the room to crack a joke (please alert my NYT anxiety) but confident and probably brave. Everyone always tells you to be yourself but she was the first person to make me believe I could do it.
  11. It's chill to have small boobs
  12. (This is dedicated to @Durga and everyone else who has been there for me every time I get emotional that both Nora Ephron and Michael Jackson are dead [WHAT IS THE POINT OF ANYTHING]. Feel free to share yr own Ephron stories if you want! I'm really emotional about this!!! More probably tk)