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I used to have a doorman in my building that would tell me such outrageous stories that I started to write them down. Here is the list, slightly edited, but basically the same as it was when I originally wrote it up years ago.
- •That he successfully hit on a girl in the following manner: Her: That's a nice hat Him: Thanks, it's a replacement Her: A replacement for what? Him: My girlfriend. She dumped me and I replaced her with this hat. Her: Wait... What? Him: You have nice tits
- •That he was at eating at Subway with his friend and he was able to get the phone numbers of every member of a group of girls eating there. This included two Asian chicks, a blonde, an Hispanic chick, a fat black chick, and a fat Hispanic chick.He then said he got all their numbers, but threw them away because he said they could have been 15 or 16 years old and he didn't want to take the chance.
- •That he used to host a radio show when he was in college, which is plausible enough. He then went on to detail a situation where he let the guy running the station rant and curse at him while secretly on the air.He claimed this led to a $100,000 fine, despite his earlier assertion that the station operated on something like a tenth of a watt, meaning there was basically no range at all for the broadcast. He had said earlier that, at most, there were a couple hundred listeners. Plus I'm pretty sure they weren't handing massive fines like that when he was in college (the late 1990's).