PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES AS HIGH SCHOOL ARCHETYPES

We're in it! Primary season has officially begun, and the candidates are vying for our attention and votes. So it's very important we learn as much as we can about them! Here is the High School archetypes they would each be!
  1. Jeb Bush
    The kid who died and the yearbook was dedicated to him.
  2. Ben Carson
    Schoolyard snitch.
  3. Chris Christie
    Guy who beats up the schoolyard snitch.
  4. Hillary Clinton
    Kid who sets the curves on all the exams.
  5. Ted Cruz
    The kid who is too weird to even beat up.
  6. Carly Fiorina
    Person who thinks, for some reason, that student body president is an actual important thing to be and goes NUTS when she doesn't win the election.
  7. John Kasich
    Curmudgeonly principal who wants to ban "touch dancing."
  8. Rand Paul
    Smart kid who also does drugs.
  9. Marco Rubio
    Cut from the lacrosse team.
  10. Bernie Sanders
    The kid with the WAY old parents.
  11. Donald Trump
    Prick who wears suits.