The primaries are in full swing, and some folks out there just don't know who to vote for. So we're laying out all the candidates' various qualifications! Here are the candidates definitively ranked by how dumb they look when seated in a giant chair.
  1. Tie - Hillary Clinton, Ted Cruz, John Kasich, Bernélope Sanders
    None of these candidates have been photographed sitting in a giant chair. As a result, they do not look dumb sitting in one.
  2. Marco Rubio
    Man, that's pretty dumb.
  3. Donald Trump
    This terrifying, monstrous giant has gorged himself on fancy foods and increased his mass substantially. The result is that even an enormous chair seems barely able to contain this hideous, inhuman beast.