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  1. I listened to Formation about seventy bajillion times and read everything anyone has ever wrote about it
  2. My water heater broke and I stayed up all night with [49er] duct trying to stop the water from flooding my house because I was too stupid to know where the water shut off was or that I could just turn off the electricity to the water heater
    It was a pretty easy fix, but then he informed me I am basically going to have to remodel my kitchen when that water heater really breaks. Fucking Michael
  3. The Catholic guy I am sleeping with came over and had sex with me before he went to church to get his ashes
    Even I find this weird. I think we're done here
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All my cats are gray...because I am a furist (for @LongStoryLonger)
  1. Stormi Witch Renfro (aka Gray?)
    The original Gray and the love of my life. She was me in cat form. Mean and hard on the surface, but loving and sweet for the right person. She was insanely jealous and would sometimes sit on Landon as if he wasn't there. I miss her everyday
  2. Landon Coal Renfro (aka Lou)
    Landon Lou, how do you do? He has a nub. And he loves to waggle it. He is obsessed with his mommy and having relations with blankets. He is the sheriff of the house and regularly conducts investigraytions.
  3. Jake Earl Lowry
    Oh my junk Jake. Found him on Craigslist and picked him up at a Walmart, he has lived up to his origins. Despite this, he is super chill and usually everyone's favorite. Those of us who know him well know that he can be a fucking asshole for no good reason. But, you can't help but love him
  4. Finn Alexander
    I got Finn about 6 months after Gray died. He is so, so smart and it's so, so annoying. He is the king of the house. If he lays down next to his brothers, they immediately start bathing him. He demands love and he always gets it
  1. 1.
    One More Thing by B.J. Novak
  2. 2.
    Yes Please by Amy Poehler
  3. 3.
    Wildflower by Drew Barrymore
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  1. When I did acid a few years ago
  2. Fucking wasn't a priority at the time -Jeni
  3. When am I going to feel it?
19 more...