HOW TO LIE

It shouldn't be this hard
  1. 1.
    Don't
  2. 2.
    BUT if you HAVE to
  3. 3.
    Get your story straight
  4. 4.
    Make it believable
  5. 5.
    Keep it light
  6. 6.
    If someone catches you in a lie, don't keep trying to lie
  7. 7.
    BUT if you HAVE to
  8. 8.
    Come up with another, more complicated lie to cover up the first one
  9. 9.
    The more detailed the better
  10. 10.
    Cover your tracks and establish evidence to support lie #2
  11. 11.
    If someone is onto you reevaluate, regain morality, and stop lying
  12. 12.
    BUT if you HAVE to
  13. 13.
    Be more convincing and manipulate that person into thinking they're out of their mind for having suspicions
  14. 14.
    Then, when your life has become a blur between truth and fiction, slowly let go of your grasp on reality completely
  15. 15.
    Flee the country
  16. 16.
    Adopt a new name, profession, and backstory
  17. 17.
    Live a lie until you forget the life you left behind
  18. 18.
    Consider whether it was all worth it
  19. 19.
    Write a long letter about your past life and the progression of lies that got you to where you are
  20. 20.
    Place the letter somewhere safe and secret
  21. 21.
    Lock it up and protect the key until you're ready for the truth to set you free
  22. 22.
    Live happily ever after and maybe read some self-help books