REASONS WHY I'M A GREAT THIRD WHEEL
Bring me along on your next date if your idea of entertainment is me recounting the weird dream I had about Justin Bieber last night
- •I'm down for whateverAs long as we eat every 2 hours
- •I spark conversation"So, peaches... Thoughts?"
- •I will serenade you in the carDon't worry, if I don't know the song I'll make you change it
- •I will fill all silence with my thoughts on last week's episode of the Bachelorette"I know you don't know what I'm talking about, but Chad..."
- •I have no problem staring at my phone to entertain myselfI welcome it, really
- •I will shower you with compliments"You're both so nice it's really weird for me, but cute I guess!"
- •Would you like to go bowling? Mini golf perhaps? Great! I'm terrible at both and will make you look like a superstar
- •I keep it real"Hey guys sorry if I smell bad it's just really hot so I'm sweating a lot"
- •I'm considerate of everyone's feelings"Am I annoying you? You both seem kind of annoyed"
- •I won't feel left out"What are you guys laughing about tell me"
- •I'm independentDon't need no man aka plz don't set me up with your weird friend
- •I'm really easygoingJust laugh at everything I say and agree with all of my very strong opinions
- •I love love 💘I may be a sarcastic asshole, but it is a beautiful thing