Because while I'm watching this crap (The Bachelorette; see previous list) I may as well rank them. Here's how I'd line em up.
  1. 9. Nick
    No one wants him there, his tight pants weird me out, and he's bonded with Kaitlyn over the fact that they're both surface level people who don't want something deep and serious. She might pick him and they might just make it for a hot sec. Have fun with that.
  2. 8. JJ
    I'm really really not sure why he's still here that crazy fool. Also he's spent more time going after the guys. Nothing wrong with that, but just saying.
  3. 7. Joe
    I honestly had to wait to rank him because I couldn't remember his name. Still like him better than Nick and JJ.
  4. 6. Chris "Cupcake"
    Yeah. Cupcake. I'm just saying I think him and JJ might make a good pair.
  5. 5. Jared
    Can we get an age check please?
  6. 4. Tanner
    I really have zero opinion. But you're very attractive. Middle of the pack you go.
  7. 3. Shawn
    Shawn is a little nuts. But he's so genuine, trusting, and sweet. He let his guard down, he's gonna lose his cool and may walk out on the process, but I think he's real. Very very real.
  8. 2. Ben Z.
    It's going to be the battle of the Ben's. Ben Z is H O T like please get me a fan and some cold water every time him and his arms and his manly scruff and his body and his everything appears on the screen because I can't deal. He's protective, he's sweet, he's 😍😍😍😍😍 yes
  9. 1. Ben H.
    As much as I can stare at Ben Z all day, I can do the same with Ben H, and he's the total package. He's down to earth, low key, patient, genuine, intelligent, and has his life together. He's ready for someone (me? Please?) And he's way way way too good for Kaitlyn. If she's smart, she'll pick him. But it wouldn't last.