It's a trite topic, but hey, I've never actually written them down. Behold my confessions:
  1. Writing introductions to books I will never actually write.
    I always find myself composing thoughtful musings on why I wrote that book about the science and history of nicknames (still a good idea and one I might do), or that book of short stories, etc...but I've never finished any of them. I've also decided to write a whole book solely of introductions...and you guessed it: I've already written the introduction.
  2. Hot, steamy, luxurious, dragon-fire temperature showers. 🔥
    I am an environmentalist at heart...vegan, take public transit, recycle, etc. But hot showers man...😍 My significant others have never enjoyed bathing with me and I'm totally cool with it.
  3. Excessive snacking...alone.
    Don't even begin to pretend with me that you don't do it too. Hummus and pita chips? Sure! A few bites of ice cream! Duh! Squares of chocolate? Yeah! Spicy tortilla chips? Why not! Unbearable stomach pain afterward? Always!
  4. Fighting with people - totally in my head.
    I'm not a combative person but ravaging you with my words of power that succinctly and accurately describe and condemn your misdeeds is surprisingly soothing. It makes me feel more calm and requires no actual yelling.
  5. Listening to Jim Dale narrate the Harry Potter Series.
    F*cking Jim Dale. He is magic in its purest form. Going back to this safe childhood space helps me find myself in perilous times.
  6. My nightly vodka and bed.
    How else do you propose I initiate sleeping? A squeeze of lime or something fizzy is an extra fantastic treat.