PERSONAL STATISTICS I WANT TO SEE AT THE END OF MY LIFE

Inspired by @michellejennifer
  1. Number of hours I've spent waiting in cars for people who promised to be ready "as soon as I got there."
  2. Number of phone calls to sleeping children ignored even though their calls to sleeping me result in instant, wide awake panic.
  3. Dollar amount of student debt paid for each college class not applicable towards any degree.
  4. Number of times I've cut, sliced, burned or smashed my fingers.
    Do numbers go that high?
  5. Number of really great shots I missed while driving.
  6. Articles of clothing I've ever owned with a palm tree on them, preferably with pictures so I can say "Hey! I remember that outfit!"
  7. Number of times people thought I sounded like a jerk when I was trying to be nice.
    Special category for sisters 😬
  8. Number of times people were mad at me for being right.