THINGS I SAID TO MY MOTHER GROWING UP THAT WOULD HAVE JUSTIFIED HER INFANTICIDE

Here is the 5 minute version of the hell I put Kendra through. Although if I made a matricide list re: her words, I'm sure we would be evenly matched. 👭 Made for each other!
  1. Are you really going to wear that? - Age 4
    I didn't let her leave the house until she changed.
  2. You're almost as pretty as Maria. - Age 6
    My stepdad's ex-wife.
  3. This ham/broccoli casserole is actually child abuse. Never cook again. - Age 12
    It was pretty bad and she made me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich but what a brat
  4. Yellow isn't your color. Stop wearing yellow. It makes you look like you have Hepatitis. - Ages 11-23
    After seeing her in yellow. And a few more times. Like yesterday.
  5. Diane is so gorgeous. - Age 5
    My biological father's girlfriend.
  6. Are you still reading that book? It's only 400 pages and it's been like 5 months. I've read a ton of books in that time. - Age 10
    She has dyslexia and was... raising me
  7. The "no one in your car for one year after you get your license" rule doesn't apply to passengers over 18. - Age 17
    A flat-out lie. It was 25 years old. And I was on her insurance.
  8. I didn't realize I was using YOUR credit card when I bought $200 worth of DVDs at Barnes and Noble. - Ages 15-21
  9. I'm sweating because I went to the gym... Not from McDonald's meat sweats. - Age High School