50 WAYS TO LEAVE YOUR PLAYDATE

No offense to Paul Simon
  1. It's time to have a snack, Jack
  2. You got something in your eye, Guy
  3. Your booger looks a little green, Gene
  4. Something's leaking from your diaper, Piper
  5. We need to go to Trader Joe's, Rose
  6. You have gymnastics class at three, Bea
  7. I think you're bleeding from your face, Chase
  8. I smell a little bit of poo, Rue
  9. I think you need to use the potty, Scotty
  10. Your goldfish crackers are all gone, Juan
  11. The plumber said he'd come at ten, Ben
  12. We're waiting for a box from Amazon Prime, Haim
  13. Is that a new rash on your chin, Finn?
  14. I think you might have yellow mucus, Lucas
  15. Grandma left a voicemail on my phone, Joan
  16. I left a load of laundry wet, Rhett
  17. You can't call people nasty names, James
  18. I'm sure that's ringworm on your face, Jace
  19. The sandbox kinda smells like puke, Luke
  20. That stranger's luring kids with candy, Andy
  21. I have a week of dinners left to make, Jake
  22. The chain is broken on that swing, Ming
  23. You almost fell into that hole, Cole
  24. We don't bite strangers on the leg, Peg
  25. That dog is chewing through his gate, Nate
  26. I think I need to feed the meter, Peter
  27. You got cut from that rusty can, Dan?
  28. We cannot spit on all the geese, Reese
  29. You're being very very rude, Jude
  30. You ate a string cheese that turned black, Zach
  31. I think that stray cat has the flu, Lou
  32. Don't push that nice girl off her bike, Mike
  33. You can't hit squirrels with a stick, Nick
  34. I got an email we're at war, Thor
  35. I think I'm starting to feel rain, Jane
  36. It's getting just a bit too dark, Mark
  37. Is that a dust storm in the air, Claire?
  38. They said there was a chance of snow, Joe
  39. You can't give random kids a kiss, Chris
  40. Mom forgot to take her pill, Lil
  41. There's something sticky on your head, Ted
  42. You have to learn to control your rage, Paige
  43. You ate our very last banana, Hannah
  44. There are bandits by the slide, Clyde
  45. I fear you've gotten way too dizzy, Izzy
  46. A leopard's missing from the zoo, Sue
  47. I think that riot's getting near, Sameer
  48. Um, it's an earthquake, Blake
  49. A demon just rose up from hell, Adele
  50. You know what, there's no real reason to leave right now, but Mommy and Daddy are just too lazy, Maisie. Sorry.