BAD SUGGESTIONS MY TWO-YEAR-OLD HAD THIS WEEKEND

He's a funny little man.
  1. "Cook diarrhea."
  2. "Fall down stairs bump head get hurt."
  3. "Hug pig kiss pig touch pig." (We went to a farm.)
  4. "Eat diarrhea."
  5. "Ruin thank you card."
  6. "Run away Grandma, new face Grandma, no feet Grandma." ("But how will she run away with no feet?" "I no know.")
  7. "Walk to Congo."
  8. "Vote president Donald Bump."
  9. "Kick diarrhea."
  10. "Hold it brown banana mush it."