Here's what my 2-year-old believes

Inspired by @LizDawson
  1. He believes that he needs to drink twelve ounces of water right before bed in order to fall asleep.
  2. He believes there are fruits and vegetables for eating and there are fruits and vegetables for playing and if you try to eat the ones for playing you should pay.
  3. He believes it's okay to touch the garbage.
  4. He believes taking a nap is a sign of weakness and letting his parents take a nap is an even bigger sign of weakness.
  5. He believes that everything is a stepstool.
  6. He believes that you should wear socks with watershoes.
  7. He believes the best time to have snack is right after we leave the house for a long drive and we forgot to pack any food.
  8. He believes that we can and should walk to Africa.
  9. He believes that his diaper can hold an infinite amount of urine and there is no amount of proof to the contrary that will dissuade him from this belief and warn us when he is about to leak.
  10. He believes that toilets are for sitting on... with diapers on.
  11. He believes he doesn't need to sleep through the night.
  12. He believes that there can never be too many stories.