⚜HALLMARKS OF MY BRAND, ACCORDING TO ME⚜

  1. Saying "same" when I see anything I relate to even a little bit
    I.E. An abandoned pack of Kraft American cheese singles I saw on the sidewalk today
  2. "atrocious"
  3. La Croix
  4. Deleting Tinder while sober and redownloading it while drunk
    I swear this is the last time, though.
  5. Using Tinder exclusively to match with dudes I know IRL.
    But not anymore, because I deleted it, remember?
  6. Horoscope Queen
  7. NYT Minus Context
    "use some self-control, please" "whoever falls in love with me is in trouble" "understand absolutely nothing, act in an impulsive and idiotic way"
  8. Remarkably good at social media stalking
    And frankly, unashamed.
  9. "You're being a drip"
    When someone is being melancholy and selfish
  10. Watercoloring personalized valentines for everyone I know
  11. Jet fuel can't melt steel beams