Inspired by @ListPrompts
  1. We met online back in the days of AOL.
  2. We chatted back and forth for several days, then agreed to have dinner that weekend.
  3. He warned me ahead of time that (a) he was 5'3" and that (b) he was touchy-feely and liked physical contact.
    I'm 5'6" so I thought (a) how bad can 3" shorter be? And (b) how physical was he really gonna get on a first, blind date.
  4. We met. He came up to my nose, barely, and I was about twice his size.
    I was instantly self-conscious, although I don't think I would have been now. But I digress...
  5. Throughout the evening he grabbed my hands and caressed them, held them and put his arm around me.
    A little weird with someone I'd known 5 minutes but I could handle it.
  6. The deal breaker came when I made a dumb joke and he laughed super loud, then SMACKED MY ASS.
  7. That was it for me. Date ended and I dodged the rest of his IMs.
  8. The end!