CHAPTER TITLES FOR THE BOOK ABOUT MY LIFE

I'd call it: amazing, Shannon is so boring
  1. wow, my dad was too lazy to drive my mom to the hospital the day I was born. at 3 in the morning. In the pouring rain
  2. my shoes are more sparkly than yours so I win
  3. STAB HER IN THE EYE
  4. Julian Olson ruins my life
  5. middle school sucks but at least I still have rice
  6. I spend lunchtime in my math classroom with all my other nerd friends. we're really lame
  7. a boy actually has a crush on me !!! oh wait he's an asshole
  8. oh wait I'm queer
  9. I go to Washington D.C. on a school trip and die
  10. the summer before high school during which I eat mass amounts of ice cream
  11. high school !!! I die !!!! stress consumes my body
  12. hot tamale, the story of how Shannon realised that she is really freaking hot