Embarrassing Moments That Still Keep Me Up at Night

  1. When I hugged a stranger's leg because I thought he was my dad.
    To be fair, I was five and the guy was in my back yard.
  2. When someone scared me during a game of hide and seek at a popular girl's birthday party and I peed my pants.
    Bonus mortification: I was 13.
  3. When a flight attendant offered me a hot towel and, instead of taking the towel, I grabbed the tongs out of his hands.
    I thought they were for my salad.
  4. When I wiped out in front of my entire summer camp while running with deodorant in my hand.
    The deodorant survived, but my confidence was pretty banged up.
  5. When I clicked a link on my crush's Facebook wall and accidentally spread a virus to half of my friends.
    And then I broke the family desktop while trying to hide the evidence.
  6. When I ripped my pants in the crotch while stretching before track practice.
    I got to skip the warm up run, but the shame wasn't worth it.
  7. When, after washing my hands, I ripped off the paper towel that the girl next to me had dispensed, said "thank you", and walked away.
    I thought she was being courteous. She really just needed more paper towel.
  8. When I fainted while standing on the commuter rail.
    I was on my way home from donating blood for the first time.
  9. When I cried "It's not about the duvet -- It's about my dignity" while fighting with my sister over a blanket.
    Sadly, I was quite serious.
  10. When I smeared sauce all over my face while eating bbq pizza in front of a hot Rugby player.
    I also ate pizza off the floor that night, but he didn't witness that.