The Time I Wore My Aviato Shirt That My Amazing Sister Bought Me To The Bar

So, my bad ass sister bought me three amazing shirts from the TV show "Silicon Valley".
  1. Needless to say all three were strait up pussy magnets but I had to choose just one.
  2. Seriously, I want to fuck myself just looking at that. I chose the aviato shirt. You may ask why but for that answer you will need to channel your inner Erlich Bachmann.
  3. Last night I'm just chilling in my aviato shirt with nothing to do when my friend asks me out to drinks
  4. I'm looking fly in my badass shirt so I'm like "let's fucking do this".
  5. We go to a local watering hole "Sporting Woody's". I can assure you it's not a gay bar.
  6. I roll up in there with my one friend but end up knowing about 20.
  7. I look like I'm way more cool and interesting than I really am.
  8. After two sips of my drink I become the life of the party and a social butterfly.
  9. I notice this girl that's a 10/10 two tables over and I politely tell her to come join my "Incubator" with my 20 followers. She obliged.
  10. She noticed I was wearing my aviato shirt and complimented me on it. I complimented her on picking the right night to be single.
  11. After an epic exchange of fantastic conversation from the likes of which none have ever seen or been apart of before, this 10/10 asked me over to her place.
  12. We get back to her place and she makes up some way too fucking strong drinks.
  13. She then begins to tell me about every relationship she's ever been in and begins to cry in my general direction.
  14. I had to slip off to the bathroom, look in the mirror to make sure my aviato shirt was okay and to give myself a pep talk over the impending situation. Many self truths were found to be evident.
  15. I go back out and change the topic of the discussion.
  16. I made her laugh quite a bit so it's not long before she wants me to go inside to Netflix and chill.
  17. My only rule was the aviato shirt doesn't Netflix on the couch, only in her bed. She kindly agrees.
  18. After 20 minutes or so of fumbling around to get the TV on and all set up and comfortable thing begin to get interesting.
  19. She began kissing me and rubbing on my just a bit. Nothing crazy but a little frisky.
  20. At this point it's like 3:30 or 4 in the a.m. so not much of anything is going to happen because I'm so drunk and tired so I just remain calm and fairly quiet.
  21. Then out of nowhere she looks strait the fuck at me and tells me "I love you and want to marry you".
  22. I politely look at her like what the actual fuck did you just say and I reply with "its not me that you like so much, it's just the goddamned aviato shirt".
  23. Talk about a boner killer. By this point I'm so tired that I'm done with life and all the cruel tricks it likes to play on me.
  24. I kiss her of the forehead and tuck her in and proceed to go to sleep.
  25. I think the power behind the aviato is not to be taken lightly.
  26. It's like the most powerful aphrodisiac known to man.
  27. It literally had the power to get my ugly ass into bed with a 10/10.
  28. I can't wait to see what power the other two shirts have
  29. It doubt it will beat waking up to a 10/10 in the morning.
    She's been texting me all day too.